Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Randomize
