love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
