Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
