i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Randomize
