"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Randomize
