I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Randomize