i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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