YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
