I am puke
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
