Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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