Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
