Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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