i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize