So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
