Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize
