i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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