He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
