SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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