She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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