Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
bring money and cleavage
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
