All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
you would pick up someone in the library
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
im holly from the hills drunk
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
