I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Randomize
