You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
