I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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