Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
