you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
