id be glad to
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
