If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
