you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
