What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
