What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
