the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize