One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
