I think my vagina is haunted
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
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