What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
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