Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
