Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
