wat bout pragnant strippers??
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm passing your future prison.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
