So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
