like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
