I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize
