I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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