yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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