Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
