You really coming over, don't trick.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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