Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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