I think i sorta joined a cult last night
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize
