he wants to bone in the snuggie
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
