Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
