I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
